Are on the H4 visa? Stop whining & complaining!


I posted this blog entry on my blog and it received a lot of positive comments. I  thought of sharing it with all of you on the H4 visa forums as well. I hope you like it as well.

The H4 visa  in U.S.

Are you on the H4 visa  in U.S.? Are you totally unhappy with how you cannot work and earn money? Well, there are several forums where people rant and rave about the H4 visa. They think it is the end of life for them and that they are trapped. They blame the Government for not allowing them to work. I even saw a blog where the blogger used the pseudonym ‘Cooped’.

Should I marry the H1 B visa holder ?

Yes, that’s the question people ask me. I personally get tons of emails where girls ask me if it is a good idea to marry an H1 B visa holder. I try my best to give a balanced perspective on what to expect. Many girls take the plunge nevertheless. While it may not be a totally rosy situation to be in, the point is no one forced you to sign up for the H4 visa. It was your call. You made the decision.

  • You wanted to get married and move to the U.S. You knew that your would-be husband was an H1 B holder.
  • You also knew that you would not be allowed to work here on the H4 visa.
  • Now that you have done that, you cannot rally against the Government for not allowing you to work.

The country has its own unemployment issues and that’s how it is in the U.S. They cannot take responsibility for every non immigrant who enters this country and give them a job! After all you are coming here as a ‘choice’. You are not being forced into it.  Accept it as part of the “U.S. dream”. If you did not know this so far, let this blog post be an eye-opener for you.

Background on H4 visa

The H4 visa is issued to the spouse and children on the H1 visa holder and the basic requirements of that visa type is that the holder must not seek employment during the stay in the U.S.

That said if you are not willing to leave your job or remain unemployed at home perhaps the H4 visa is not for you. Many folks get frustrated and need someone to point them in the right direction. Others lose interest, feel ‘cooped in’ and just move back to their home country. Hence it is always a good idea to know what to expect: Working is a big NO on H4 visa. There are no exceptions. If you love your job and have little interest in staying at home, perhaps H4 visa is not for you.

If you are ok with this you should embrace the life on the H4 visa in US with open arms!

Statistics on stay at home women in the U.S.

Research suggests that there are a very high number of stay at home moms (5.6 million) as compared to stay at home dads (165,000) in the U.S. This demographic largely consists of women who stay at home to take care of their families, did not work for the entire previous year and had a husband who worked for 52 weeks (Washington Post, October 2009*).

According to the United States Department of Labor,

  • Women comprised 46.8 percent of the total U.S. labor force and are projected to account for 46.9 percent of the labor force in 2018.  There appears to be no drastic change and the number in percentage terms is expected to increase just by 0.1 in the next 8 years.
  • Of the 122 million women age 16 years and over in the U.S., 72 million, or 59.2 percent, were labor force participants—working or looking for work**. This means that about 40% of the women in this bracket are not employed or seeking employment.

So it is not only you. There are several others who stay at home ‘by choice’.

Even if you are not planning to start a family, there are a lot of alternate things to do and with the advancement of technology and communication the opportunities have only quadrupled in the past decade. Let me discuss a typical scenario for H4 visa holders and some ideas in the next section.

Typical scenario for H4 visa holders

Here is a typical scenario for H4 visa holders. Once people come to the U.S. on the H4 visa they realize how different reality is from what they had hoped for. They assume that they can figure things out but that takes time and effort. Some are ready to do what it takes to reach their goals. Others post hate mails on forums and any other platform where they can be heard.

These few that complain do not represent the vast majority of people living in the U.S. on H4 visa.

I have a different take on things. If you feel cooped you will be cooped! If you feel happy you will be happy! There are ups and lows but it is better to make the best of the situation.

The usual life trajectory of the H4 visa holder

Even though there is no research to prove this, the usual life trajectory that any H4 visa holder follows is somewhat like the following:

  1. Sit at home. Get bored.
  2. Pursue interests/hobbies.
  3. Volunteer and get involved in community service.
  4. Study.
  5. Apply for a different visa and work or start a family.

What you can do on the H4 visa is totally on you. Here are some likely scenarios.

  1. I want to work eventually : If you think that you have to get back to work then look for alternatives in that direction. Study and get a work permit or look for a company that is willing to sponsor your visa based on your skill set.
  2. I don’t care. I have to move back to my country : If you think that you are in the U.S. for a very short time and you definitely plan to move back to your home country try to seize opportunities that would not be available to you in your home country. For example you can travel extensively in the country, try backpacking, scuba diving, para sailing, aqua zumba, belly dancing, etc.
  3. I want to become become a Crafts Entrepreneur: If you want to pursue an interest and eventually start your own business (once you get a Green Card) work in that direction. Hone your skills and study different crafts. Take a business course.
  4. I want to write my own book some day: Take a literature course. Start blogging. Start researching at home. Learn how to annotate, quote, and find references. Play around with writing softwares and join a writer’s guild.

Stop whining!

There are a lot of opportunities and it will not help if you just sit on your rear end and whine. Whining only increases blood pressure and causes psychological and physical disorders. What’s the alternative: know your options and make an informed decision. Be happy with your decision!

Life on the H4 visa is great.

Life is not all that bad on the H4 visa. After all you have the opportunity to enjoy the best quality of life. There are no power cuts and the streets are free of crime. Roads are in great condition and the quality of higher education is par excellent. There is social security, economic security, and clean air. What more can you ask for?



Some how We try to convince

Some how We try to convince ourselves ... but its not working..  :(

Frustration remains... not sure when i will be getting used to this situation.. itsbeen 5 months i am struggling to come out..

Its very difficult for the

Its very difficult for the one who already worked for years in India, and stay between four walls of a sudden all the time.  There are no power cuts, but cant keep watching tv all the time, streets are free of crime and so scared to even walk on the road, which is ofcourse not a good part. we show the exact dictionary meaning of Dependency...

I know its diffucult, but no options, just  and take it....

Thank you

Thank you for sharing such great thoughts. You rightly pointed out that "you feel the way you think". The key is to be positive and not lose patience. 

seeking a professional course on +1.5 years stay under H4 visa



Greetings for the day.


My wife applied for H1 visa where i will be coming along as dependent visa ( H 4 ) for 1.5  to 2 years approx.

My query is to explore a course in Seatle ( USA ) which can add value to my existing profile. I would prefer if it is of supply chain OR sales and distribution module in SAP OR certification in import export management or any other course having duration of 4 - 6 months which can have international value ( value in India ).


Following is my current profile:


Name: Loveleen kakra

Age:    32 years

Industry: Freight forwarding ( International logistics )

Experience: + 6 years

Company:  TKW Management solutions pvt Ltd

Location :   Delhi ( India )


Academic Qualification:    Bachelor of Arts from Kurukshetra University

professional Qualification: PGDBA from Symbiosis ( Distance learning )


please inform over mail / phone with complete course fee, duration, content and admission criteria/ documentation required etc.


With regards

Loveleen (9891780344)



Regarding my H4 visa

Hi. My name is sravanthi. I got married on 18-FEB-2011. My husband did not have H1 visa when we got married. He left to US on March 20th after our marraige. He wanted to apply for H1 visa APR 2011. There was query was on his VISA. His employer did not apply for premium processing and his F1 was on hold due his H1 visa process. This process got so delayed that we got to know in the end of JAN 2012 that his H1 was rejected.  I couldn't risk by applying for F2 visa and applied for visiting visa and got rejected twice. However this year my Husband's H1 visa is approved for 3 years till 31 st Oct 2015. Am planning to apply for H4 visa next month. I need guidance in this matter. There are chances of interviewer asking me as to why we have delayed so long in applying visa. Do give me your valuble suggestions. Thanks in advance.

Request Number?


I want to ask a question.

My husband is in U.S holding a H1B visa and I'm trying to apply for a H4 visa.
My question is regarding the schedule appointment from website.
-->,  it ask about the Petitioner Request Number and Petitioner Receipt Number? The Receipt Number can be found from my husband's I-797 form. But what's the Request Number?

H4 Visa Fee

Hello All,

We wrongly paid the fee in HDFC for H4 Visa. Instead of Rs 11020, we paid Rs 9820. We were asked to contact VFS office. VFS said that we can either pay the balance amount by cash or DD at the time of Interview. Is this true or we need to take a new DD and procees with DS-160?..please advice

I believe some changes needed

As the article says, there are so many people who can't work but want to because of their visa status. The author mentions 5.6 millions of home mom in the U.S., but those millions of people are not enforced to be SAHMs, while most of h4 holders have no options at all. I strongly believe that the U.S. visa system should be amended for those people who came/will come to U.S. with their studying or working husbands (or spouses). The U.S. immigrant law should give some life to the H4 holders. It shouldn't be like the life of citizens or green card holders, or H-1/F-1 visa holders. Just give some freedom of work - such as 5-10 hours of work per week, something like that.

It is too harsh for H-4 visa holders eliminate their minimum freedom of economic activities.

I could work with my student visa (of course, 20 hours per week max), and now I am waiting my green card coming. I will be able to work very soon eventually. But I have seen so many friends who are living with depressed minded because of this ridiculous law...

Question about deposit $ to the US Bank Account

Hi Admin,

Iam currently on H4 and been here for more than a year now. I was successfully able to open a Bank account in BOA.

I get some pocket money from my husband on a monthly basis that I deposite in my account. I was quite not sure how safe is that. Will there be a problem depositing money in my induvidual account given by my husband, I get about $50/$100/$200 every month that i deposite to my induvidual account.

Is this safe? Will there be an issue? I have been doing this for more than 8 months now.

Could you please advice on this so that I can be clear if there would be any issues in future.

Thanks in advance. 




My Experience

I came to the US on L2 but I was able to work online for only a short while as my husband was not supportive and I have a son who has some health issues. Then my husband got his H1 and now I am on H4. Having been independent before I got married, now I find it difficult to be dependent for everything on my husband. With great difficulty, I managed to let my husband to let me drive. He is a close minded person who does not believe in giving freedom or space to the wife. But, since I can drive now, with new found confidence I take my son to diifferent classes. I am on the PTA board of my son's school. I volunteer at his school. I am able to be around my son for longer periods of time. I wanted to volunteer for my son's doctor's research program. But, since the hospital is university affliated and they have a policy of not letting people without EAD to volunteer (stupid policy), I couldn't. If I had been able to, it would have given me immense pleasure and also a lot of exposure. For now, I am looking further to find a way to better engage myself and also earn a bit so that I don't have to be dependent on my husband for every penny. Since I am on the PTA board, I have been meeting a lot of new people and this has been causing friction between us as he doesn't like me being so well known. He is trying to control me and how I spend my time. The sooner I start earning the better it will be for my mental health. 

Reply to GB

Dear GB,

Thank you for sharing your honest experience. We hope that you find a resolution soon. What is very motivating about your story is this: you have quickly analyzed your situation, taken taken things in your control (despite lesser than you expect support) and your initiative is commendable. 

We sincerely hope that you get a job , if that's important to you.

Again, thank you for posting and sharing your experience.




Appling for H4 visa

Hey all, 

My wife applied for tourist visa in Feb,2013 from London. Her request was not accepted and the reaon given was "GIVEN REASON OF LESS SOCIAL CONNECTIONS IN UK." Now in the Month of May,2014 she will be appling her H4 visa. So my question would be:

1) Does the rejection of tourist visa will cause any effect on H4 visa approval.

2) What\How should we prepare  for the H4 visa interview.

Any help will be much appreaciated.





H4 visa effects

The H4 Effects


1. Does a spouse have
the authority to define its martial partner's rights?

If yes, then which
gender or which partner has the higher ranking over the other in a

If no, then why is this
still exercised in the case of H4 visa? Is the cost of choosing
love/marriage going to substituted by taking away earning rights?


2. All
immigration/non-immigration policies were created during slavery
period, and yet in 2014 not being able to update these policies will
simply mean practicing slavery! Does a human on H4 visa status have
the right to start its own small-scale business and earn its revenue?

No, they can only setup
high-scale business via $500,000 investment and via green-card
process (maintaining these investments for a period of 2 years +) or
choose to work for others idea on H1 visa (thereby practicing
slavery) = which means if a H4 visa holder's revenue does not meet
half the million USD then he/she is longer eligible for earning their
own revenue (no matter how content the H4 visa holder feels/wants,
the capabilities are defined by USCIS regulations)


3. Why is this process
difficult for H4 visa holders? Especially if the human was born under
certain geographical location then they can earn their complete
rights after the period of 9 years (in case of India/China) again
through green-card process. But are these individuals here for
American dream, or are there here because of their talent? There is
no reasonable path for talent-growth for H4 visa holders. Why and
how is it valid to take away a human's earning rights?


4. The H1-visa holder's
tax is not used for their spouse's H4 visa policy updates, why? Every
year atleast 100,000 visas are granted for H1 which means if these
candidates chooses to marry their spouse will be on H4 if unemployed
by others. This also impacts the local-business (geographically)
around H4 visa holders because if he/she does not have the right to
earn, how will they investment/spend on other businesses
(real-estate, textile, entertainment, etc) This is the reason why so
many local business fails because it offers the illusion of
high-traffic (population) thereby forcing them too to work for others
idea. (Also if the H4 is not working they do not pay tax, hence the
demand-supply calculations are not reliable in predictions for
state-revenue resource planning)


5. Realistically
speaking, any individual's growth (group of which constitutes the
country's growth) is dependent on diverse design models for which
he/she is talented, being able to contribute that unique design
without design constraints by third party helps in generating
talent-growth, more happy people, more revenue, less crimes, etc etc
etc. Hence if we really want to succeed as a diverse society we have
to look beyond the tags (such as H4, H1, etc) and support talent.
Expecting a fully grown adult (who is highly skilled and capable) to
be dependent on their spouse or employer or high investments yields
what (allowing a talent to be wasted)?


6. On the other hand,
H1 visa holder has additional responsibility of the spouse, he/she
will experience burden at some point of the time during marriage.
Today they are facing rejection of love/marriage due to their H1 visa
status, as a result many talented H1 visa holders are leaving United
States of America for good leaving the local-businesses with lesser
talent to grow their business. When a design model requires
credential to meet, the qualifying design gets manipulated as it no
longer supports diversity. Is diversity welcomed only in personal or
spiritual grounds but on design/career grounds? The dreams of H4 are
caged until he/she no longer holds the title H4 visa holder.


7. Conclusion: current
H4 visa regulations effects H4 visa holders, H1 visa holders,
local-businesses, tax (revenue collection) and precious time :)

H4 visa transfer


Hi all, my query is ... my hubby is working with employer A now with H1b visa.I got my h4 visa 3 months back.but I havent travelled yet to the hubby is now plannihg to switch to another company.he got is h1b doubt is should I again go visit the consulate for my h4 transfer? Thanks in advance

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